Monday, October 8, 2012
Competing Forces of Desire and Reality
It's never easy to face the reality of something we don't want to believe. Why? Because it hurts. It's that simple - it hurts. Sometimes it hurts for awhile, and sometimes it hurts for a lifetime. As I near the final chapters of Pages in the Wind, Emily is faced with an ugly reality as she graduates from high school and plans to leave her past behind for a new life in a new place. She is hopelessly conflicted, and the conflict lies between her desire and her reality:
Step by step, I just kept walking in the direction of the cafeteria. I knew that my thoughts were jumbled, remnants of this and remnants of that - thoughts strung together like some haphazard quilt. Desire and reality were competing for my attention. My desire was to stay here, to live out the fantasy of belonging to a happy family but reality was also here - walking in the direction of the cafeteria. I knew that I just needed to keep walking without stopping - just keep putting one foot in front of the other in the direction of Robert and his plan to leave. I knew that if I stopped walking, I would run in the other direction. I would run in the direction of my desire, and the ugly truth is that my desire was nothing more than a made-up fantasy that would never, ever happen.
Her choice will ultimately change the course of her life. The competing power of desire and reality end up colliding - and what happens will be a turning point in her life and one that she could not have anticipated.