I wonder what happens if a child grows up in a hyper-controlled environment, and freedom of choice is not afforded to him. How does that affect him as he matures? We see this in Pages in the Wind, as Emily, on the threshold of adulthood, ponders her future:
I relaxed into the pillows on my bed and stared at the ceiling, wondering how my life would unfold. This is my new start. My eyes spanned the walls and noted that they were freshly painted. It’s a blank canvas, waiting for life, like me. That is how I feel, like a new canvas waiting to be painted. I can leave the last seventeen years behind and start over. What will life draw on my canvas?
It doesn’t occur to Emily that she can draw on her own canvas. She is so conditioned to life happening to her, instead of creating her own life. In a sense, the wall represents her inertia. Think of a wall, an inanimate structure in which people brush against it leaving a mark, a picture is hung leaving a hole. In time, the wall shows wear all created by life, by others. That is how Emily sees herself, at least for now. Emily is creative and she is passionate, traits that do not flourish in an atmosphere of oppression. Will she break through the wall and write on her own canvas?Can you relate to this feeling?